Being a woman I know how it feels when you have to leave your parents after marriage. Immediately after marriage you are altogether a new person who can handle responsibilities and knows all the ups and downs of life. Though marriage is a great institution and I respect it completely, but I really wonder who has created this particular custom of marriage in which a girl must leave her home to go to a place which is later known as her permanent residence? Also what are the reasons behind creating this and what are the consequences of this tradition?
Firstly, may be, the custom of keeping slaves and slavery in past had given rise to this tradition. Women during that time were considered slaves and could be exchanged for goods and money. This means that the buyer would take her along with him. With time men have understood the importance of women in their life, so even though many things have changed, except a man taking a woman to his home after marriage. In most societies, today’s woman enjoys equal rights, has all the freedom and take equal responsibility of earning and running a family.
Also I personally feel that one’s place of action and deed are different from the place of birth. You enjoy your childhood and teenage at your birthplace and then move to a place where you have to take the responsibilities, perform your duties and play your role as a wife and mother.
But looking other way round it is clear that in today’s society this custom has created lots of problems. Many couples and families do not want a girl child as they know that after marriage she will leave them and it is only their son who would look after them in the future.
Though, neither I am in the favor of changing this tradition nor there should be some in between solution like bride and bridegroom both leaving their respective homes and started living at new place. But certainly there should be more respect for woman in the society. Since her birth she should not be taken as a burden, but must be given good education and confidence to live her life with dignity and on her own if required. She should be made strong enough to handle all the odds of the society.
The past few decades have seen some significant changes in the role of women in our society but there are still many challenges to be tackled and questions in the world to be answered such as why do we still have cases of female feticide when we say both male and female are equal? Why people still clear their debts by marrying their young girls to much older men? Why there are so many cases of rape and sexual assault in the society on daily basis? Even if a girl is not going out of her house for work she is looking after the family and doing her job of home-maker round the clock and without any complaint. She should be respected in society and at marriage must not be considered as a part of “Kanyadaan” – donation of a daughter. Leaving her home after marriage should be considered as a part of her growth as a person but this does not mean that she is no longer your daughter and cannot take care of you.